struggles — Blog — Kristen Alexis Cave

If I were to ask you, “What is something you’re struggling with right now?” how would you answer that question? Would you say you’re struggling with comparing yourself to the girl in your sorority who seems to have it all together?Would you say you’re struggling with navigating a difficult relationship with a family member? Would you say you’re struggling with feeling like a failure because you’re about to graduate and you have no idea what your next steps are?Would you say you’re struggling with being content in your singleness while watching your friends get engaged?Would you say you’re struggling with dealing with pain that’s affecting your physical or mental health?

Kristen CaveApril 30, 2020struggle, struggles, seasons, singleness, mental health, comparison, graduation, relationships, kristen alexis campComment

To The Girl Trying To Be Like Everyone Else

It happens a lot when I read books, blog posts, or instagram captions written by my favorite authors. I take in each word with so much wonder and admiration a little bit of envy sprinkled in. I think, “Wow, if I can just write like her, I’ll be good.” And so I try. I’ve tried changing my voice and my style, making the necessary adjustments so I sound like whoever I’m trying to mimic. But by the end of whatever I’ve written, I read back through the paragraphs and think, “This doesn’t sound like me.”

It’s the same feeling you get when you try on a piece of clothing in a store that doesn’t really match your style. Sure, it might be cute, and it might be trendy, but it’s not you. But you think if you wear it, people will notice you. People will like you. And people will admire you.

Kristen CaveNovember 20, 2019compare, comparison, comparing, competition, body image comparison, unique, uniqueness, instagram, insecurity, copy, faith, struggles, struggle, kristen alexis campComment

To The Girl With The Broken Heart

Getting your heart broken can feel like you got the wind knocked out of you, like a sudden blow you didn’t see coming that instantly makes you unable to catch your breath. Initially, the impact of heartbreak is disorienting and confusing. You start asking yourself questions like, “How did this happen?”, “What did I do to deserve this?”, and my very favorite “What am I going to do now?” You question your worth. You question your identity, and you question your future, realizing your life just changed in a matter of minutes and you never saw it coming.

To The Girl Feeling Tempted To Settle

Waiting sucks.

But I don’t have to tell you that. I feel like that statement is just a universal truth. We don’t like waiting for anything, especially when it’s something we really, really want. We would just prefer for God to move at the same speed as a fast food drive-thru. Better yet, if He could go as fast as the Jimmy John’s delivery guys, that would be ideal.

To The Girl Who Feels Like God Let Her Down

I don’t like talking about my mistakes or my doubts or my insecurities. When I do talk about those things though, I want everything to have a nice red bow tied around it. I want to prove to everyone (including myself) that everything works out eventually and that it’s all going to be okay. I like talking about how I’ve overcome the mistakes, the doubts, and the insecurities, but that means I’m only talking about them after the fact. I never talk about my mess in the middle of the mess.

So I’m about to change that.

To The Girl Who Doesn't Like What She Sees In The Mirror

A couple months ago, a friend of mine was getting ready for an upcoming beach trip. We were talking about what she was going to pack and the different outfits she wanted to bring. After several pieces of clothing had been thrown into the reject pile on her bedroom floor, I could tell she was starting to get frustrated. I had a feeling I knew what was wrong, so I was careful when I asked her if she was okay. She let out a big puff of air before she responded, and then she said this:

“It’s just annoying because I’m not a size 2 like all of my friends who are going on this trip, and I don’t feel good in anything, and I wish I was skinnier.”

How To Keep Going When The Doors Keep Closing

Have you ever been in a season where nothing seems to go your way? You get excited for this opportunity or that possibility, but then things don’t work out how you wanted them to. One door closes, and then another, and then another. You keep trying to make something happen, but with no luck. And eventually you get to the point where you’re afraid to walk up to another door because you don’t want to be disappointed if it closes too.

I get it. Shattered dreams, unfulfilled expectations, failures, they’re all disheartening. And when they come in multitudes, it’s that much more difficult to keep going. I don’t know about you, but I can only get knocked down so many times before I’m ready to just sit on the ground for a little while.

To The Girl Who Feels Like She's Stuck On The Sidelines Watching Someone Else Win

“Why does she always get everything she wants? Why do things always seem to go her way? Why does she always win? Can’t it be my turn? Why do I have to keep waiting?”

I’m sure I’m not the only one who’s had thoughts like this. We all know that girl who seems to just coast through life, getting everything she ever wanted, whenever she wants it. She gets the dream job, then she scores a promotion. She drives a new car, lives in the super nice apartment, dates the perfect guy, goes on the extravagant vacations…the list keeps going.