appearance — Blog — Kristen Alexis Cave

To The Girl Who Doesn't Like What She Sees In The Mirror

A couple months ago, a friend of mine was getting ready for an upcoming beach trip. We were talking about what she was going to pack and the different outfits she wanted to bring. After several pieces of clothing had been thrown into the reject pile on her bedroom floor, I could tell she was starting to get frustrated. I had a feeling I knew what was wrong, so I was careful when I asked her if she was okay. She let out a big puff of air before she responded, and then she said this:

“It’s just annoying because I’m not a size 2 like all of my friends who are going on this trip, and I don’t feel good in anything, and I wish I was skinnier.”

Character Lasts, Good Looks Don't

Have you ever been sitting in a Starbucks when a guy walks in and you think, “Dang I want my husband to look like that”? Or maybe you were scrolling through Instagram and saw a guy who was your type down to the green specks in his eyes and the type of shoes he was wearing. You start making mental notes or you add to your “list” more and more physical attributes you’d like for your husband to have. Brown/blonde hair, blue eyes, a pretty smile, at least 6’2, and an athletic build were just a few that showed up on my list the first time I wrote it out. (Don’t judge me.)

It’s funny for me to look back on that version of my list now and see how detailed I was about what I wanted my husband to look like. I wrote down things about his height, his hair color, whether or not he had tattoos, even the way he dressed. But over the past few years, my list has had several updated drafts. And in all the ways my list has changed, it’s shifted the most in regards to my standards on appearance. Because if I’ve learned anything about dating and relationships, it’s that there’s more to a person than how they look.

There Is Beauty In Your Uniqueness

Does anyone else find it hard to believe that we are almost a third of the way through 2018? Time just seems to be flying. Summer is just around the corner and I can’t wait. That may be due to the fact that here in Georgia we aren’t really experiencing spring, but more of a never-ending peek-a-boo winter that makes it impossible to pick out an outfit in the morning. (If you live in the south, you know exactly what I’m talking about.) But I digress.

As I think back over the first third of the year and its highs and lows, one of the things that comes to mind was my New Year’s Resolution. And by that I mean, I can’t even remember what it was. (#NewYearSameMe) Meanwhile, as I was trying to ignore my lack of ability to stick with my New Year’s goals, one of my friends and her resolution last year came to mind, and I really wanted to share it with you.