To The Girl Trying To Be Like Everyone Else

This past weekend I went over to my parents’ house to hangout for the afternoon. While I was there, my dad wanted to show me a few YouTube videos he’d found of some of his favorite country songs. (YouTube TV has really revolutionized my dad’s life recently.)

One of the videos we landed on was of Vince Gill performing at George Jones’s funeral at the Grand Ole Opry. Before he performed the song he was going to sing, Vince told a couple of stories that related to George Jones, and one of those stories in particular caught my attention.

He said when he was first getting started in his career, he was in a recording studio working on his first album. While he was singing one particular song, the producer stopped the music abruptly. Vince asked why the producer paused the track, and the producer responded, “Vince, we already have George Jones. You’ve got to figure out a way to sing like you.”

For the rest of the day I couldn’t get that story out of my head. Here was one of the greatest artists in the history of country music, who also happens to have one of the most distinct voices in the genre, talking about his initial struggle with trying to be too much like someone else.

I don’t know about you, but I’ve definitely been guilty of making the same mistake Vince Gill did. I’ve taken my God-given gifts and talents and tried to morph them and mold them so that they look exactly like someone else’s...someone who’s way more successful and well known than I am.

It happens a lot when I read books, blog posts, or instagram captions written by my favorite authors. I take in each word with so much wonder and admiration a little bit of envy sprinkled in. I think, “Wow, if I can just write like her, I’ll be good.” And so I try. I’ve tried changing my voice and my style, making the necessary adjustments so I sound like whoever I’m trying to mimic. But by the end of whatever I’ve written, I read back through the paragraphs and think, “This doesn’t sound like me.”

It’s the same feeling you get when you try on a piece of clothing in a store that doesn’t really match your style. Sure, it might be cute, and it might be trendy, but it’s not you. But you think if you wear it, people will notice you. People will like you. And people will admire you.

The same goes for every other aspect of our lives. We buy into the lies that say,

“If my sense of humor was like hers, I’d be the life of every party.”

“If I had her confidence and boldness, I could land that promotion hands down.”

“If I looked like her, I would surely have a boyfriend right now.”

“If I had her personality, I’d have more friends than I could count."

You could probably add a few more statements to this list that you’ve told yourself over the years. I know I could. It’s like we think there’s a formula we have to follow if we want to be loved, accepted, and successful. But let me tell you right now, that couldn’t be further from the truth.

We have all been uniquely gifted by our Creator with the specific talents, characteristics, and personality traits He thought were best when He formed us in our mother’s womb. He didn’t just make one woman and press “Copy + Paste” from then on out. He was so intentional with not only how He made you, but what He made you for.

It’s like what Paul says in 1 Corinthians about how the body is made of up many distinct parts. He writes, "Now if the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the body. And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the body. If the whole body were an eye, where would the sense of hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell be? But in fact God has placed the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be. If they were all one part, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, but one body” (1 Corinthians 12:15-20).

Each part of the body was created to fulfill a different purpose, just like we were created to fulfill a unique purpose with our lives.

If Vince Gill had just tried to become another George Jones, his life, and country music as a whole, would look very different right now. The same is true for you. If you spend your life trying to be just like someone else, think of what the world could be missing out on. Be who you were created to be, instead of trying to be a replica of someone else.

There’s no doubt that George Jones will forever be known as one of the greatest country artists of all time. But so will Vince Gill, and not because he was a carbon copy of another legend, but because he figured out how to sing like himself.

So if you find yourself trying to fit into someone else’s mold, or if you’re trying so hard to look like someone else that you’re losing yourself in the process, I’d encourage you to take a step back. What would it look like for you to figure out how to live like you? Instead of copying someone else word for word, outfit for outfit, trait for trait, take some time to look closely at how God has created you. Pay attention to the qualities He’s uniquely gifted you with, and begin to use those in a way that makes sense in the context of your life and your circumstances.

You were not put on this earth to live someone else’s life. You were put on this earth to glorify your Heavenly Father with the life that He gave specifically to you. So why not step out of someone else’s shoes, and instead take a stroll in your own pair for a change?