Fighting To Be Right

“You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.” - James 4:14

Each week during my life group, we split by gender into what we call “guy/girl time” or “share/prayer time.” This is the time when the guys and girls separate and spend time sharing burdens, confessing sin, and praying for each other. It’s my absolute favorite part of life group.

A few months ago during one of our share/prayer times, my friend Meredith was praying for me. I can’t remember exactly what she was praying about, but there was one statement she made during her prayer that stuck out to me, so much so that as soon as she said “amen,” I grabbed my phone and wrote down the statement she made.

I’ve thought a lot about her statement in the last few months, and it’s one that I want to share with you. Just as a warning, this is a pretty convicting statement if you let it sink in. But I strongly believe we’d all be better for it if we’d take it to heart.

Here’s what Mer said:

A Christian is not someone who fights to be right all the time or who has to win every argument. A Christian is someone who loves the Lord so much and who can’t bear to do anything that grieves Him.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t handle it well when I’m wrong, especially if I think I’m right. And oftentimes, when I’m convinced I’m right, I will fight tooth and nail to convince my opposing party that they need to agree with me.

But lately, the Holy Spirit has been reminding me of this statement a lot, specifically when I’m desperate to convince someone that I’m right and they’re wrong. And the more I think about Mer’s prayer, the more I start to wonder, “Is it really going to matter if I’m right about this in the grand scheme of eternity?”

Over the past few years, the Lord has been teaching me the value of having an eternal mindset. It’s so easy for us to get caught up in the here and now and be completely engulfed with our earthly lives. But we can’t forget what James said regarding our life here on earth: “You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes” (James 4:14).

This life is like a breath, here and gone in a second. It’s like a tiny dot on an endless timeline. So much of what we get hung up on now will not matter in the slightest in eternity. And yet, it’s those little things (that we often turn into big things) that affect our relationships, our witness, and our ability to love and treat others the way Jesus commanded us to.

I don’t want to step into eternity and realize that I allowed my desire to be right (and my desire to be seen by others as right) to rule my earthly life. Instead, I want to step into eternity having been the kind of person Mer prayed about, one who loved the Lord with her whole heart and who couldn’t bear to do anything that broke His heart.

After all, when I stand before the Lord one day, I don’t think He’s going to ask me how often I was right or how many arguments I won. He’s going to want to know if I lived a life that was full of loving Him and loving others.

So with this in mind, I hope you’ll join me as I strive to live my life with Meredith’s statement as a guiding light. May we be the type of Christians who don’t have to fight to be right all the time or win every single argument, but instead, may we be the type of Christians who love the Lord so much and who can’t bear to do anything that grieves Him.