Moments of Asking and Moments of Answering
Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. – Matthew 7:7
I got married at the age of 29, which was exactly seven years later than I had anticipated…that is, according to the life plan I meticulously wrote out when I was a junior in high school.
I knew from the time I was a little girl that I always wanted to be married. There was no question about it. So I figured that after high school, I would go off to college, meet the man of my dreams, and I’d become an official member of the “Ring by Spring” club, getting married right after graduation.
But that was not my story.
Seven years passed after my college graduation happened before I finally walked down the aisle, so you can imagine what my prayer life looked like during that time.
Lord, I want to be married so bad. When is it finally going to happen for me?
Jesus, I truly believe you’ve given me this desire to be a wife, so why is it taking so long for me to find my person?
God, I’m getting impatient. Every day it gets tougher to wait. When are you going to fulfill this desire that I have?
Lord, I’m starting to think marriage is never going to happen for me. What the heck is your plan for all of this?
Yes, I actually prayed that last prayer…multiple times, actually. I lost count of the number of prayers I prayed asking God to grant my desire to be married and to bring me and my husband together.
I asked, and asked, and asked again.
And then, after so many of those prayers, I finally got my answer. The day came where I was going to walk down the aisle to my husband and say “I do.”
On that sunny afternoon in April, after my hair and makeup were complete, it was time to put on my dress. There were quite a few buttons, so my mom helped to get me fastened in and placed my veil on my head. When she was done, I turned around, seeing myself in the mirror for the first time, and it felt like my heart caught in my throat.
It almost didn’t seem real because I had waited for this day for so long. But here I was, about to get married to the man I’d been waiting for and praying for for years.
My prayer had finally been answered. And so I savored that moment.
It was just a moment, but a moment that felt like it was just mine and God’s…a moment I’ll remember for the rest of my life.
It was one of those moments where a bunch of memories started playing in my head like a movie montage.
God had, in fact, heard every single one of those prayers over the seven years between my “planned” wedding and my actual wedding. He had listened to me list out my frustrations about being single. He had been patient with me every time I was losing my patience with Him. And He had shown me grace and compassion when I started to doubt Him because I didn’t understand His plan or His timing.
So yes, He answered my prayer, but the answer meant so much more because of all that we had gone through leading up to it. That’s why I wanted to savor that moment, because it was a culmination of so many moments before it of me asking God for something I so desperately wanted, and Him caring for me along the way until it was time for Him to give it to me.
I tell you this story because I know how often we go through seasons that are full of more asking moments than answering moments. I want you to know that if you feel like you’ve been asking – or even begging – God to grant you the desires of your heart, you’re not alone.
And more than anything, I want to encourage you that these moments when you’re asking – when you’re fumbling down the path with Jesus even though it looks nothing like the path you wanted to take – these are the moments where your faith grows the most. These are the moments when your relationship with God goes deeper than it ever has. These are the moments God is planting something within you and preparing you for the harvest down the road.
I know these moments are hard. I know they’re filled with tears and doubts and frustrations. I know they’re sprinkled with angry prayers and lots of questions. But friend, hold on to these moments. Don’t discount them, because one day, I pray you will be looking back on them in the midst of your answered prayer, thanking God for the moments that led you here.